It’s been seven years of choosing her, even though she left me four years ago. And still, she hasn’t let me go, despite already choosing someone else, someone who then left her. Is this my circle of death?
She reached out to me again, and again I couldn’t stop myself from connecting with her. Once more, I’ve fallen into the trap of love. Four years ago, I chose to walk away just to see her happy. But this time, I want to choose myself. And i know she will start hating me after this, but i think this is how she will choose the one for herself, while having even 1% of affection for me she will ruin her life. I want to see her happy.
I’m bleeding inside because today I’m going to hurt her the way she hurt me — not because I want to, but because I have to. For her good. For my good. Because the way she reacted on that video call has thrown me into a deep ocean of overthinking, and i know she love someone else, i cannot be selfish this time, i wanted to meet her, but may be in another universe, but i will pray god to keep her safe and to ever safer, don't let her meet me, cause i will not be able to bear the pain of her thinking she's mine but i know the truth that she's not mine anymore, atleast not in this life.
I'm going to agra on the day i wanted to meet her, i'm going to the place where she put my emotions into a graveyard, I'm going to where she killed me, perhaps in this life i can get peace but I don’t want to die drowning in my own thoughts. So i'm going to do what i never wanted to do. Maybe this is what the end looks like. Maybe this is how the story ends.
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